“Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator.” —Colossians 3:9–10
There is a quiet struggle that many Christians face—one that doesn’t often make headlines but weighs heavily in the daily grind of real life: the struggle to be faithful over the long haul. Many begin the race with zeal, but maintaining consistency in the small, seemingly mundane habits of faithfulness—especially in the home—can feel like a war against gravity.
We all know what it’s like to start a good habit and then, slowly, imperceptibly, drift back into old patterns. A Bible reading plan or family worship begins with intention, but busyness, discouragement, or simply inertia crowds it out. A renewed desire to love well, lead wisely, or serve cheerfully fades under the pressures of work, fatigue, or interpersonal tension. The result is often a subtle return to spiritual apathy dressed in the language of “realism” or even “Christian freedom.”
But the call to walk in newness of life is not seasonal. It is daily. It is not flashy. It is faithful.
Look to Christ
Michael Reeves once said, “When we open the Bible we do so to re-warm our hearts with the knowledge of Christ.” This is where real transformation begins—not with grit, but with glory. John Owen famously observed, “Our greatest hindrance in the Christian life is not our lack of effort, but our lack of acquaintedness with our privileges.” And our greatest privilege is Christ Himself.
When we drift into laziness, legalism, or apathy, it’s not usually because we’ve thought too little of ourselves—but because we’ve thought too little of Him. Reeves is right again: “Most of our Christian problems and errors of thought come about precisely through forgetting or marginalizing Christ.”
So what does faithfulness look like? It begins by looking to Christ:
- Look to Him who is gentle and lowly of heart, who does not break the bruised reed (Matt. 11:29; Isa. 42:3).
- Look to the One whose blood cleanses you from all sin, whose intercession never ceases, and whose mercy is new every morning (1 John 1:7; Rom. 8:34; Lam. 3:23).
- Look to the King who stoops to wash feet, the Shepherd who lays down His life for the sheep, the Bridegroom who rejoices over His bride (John 13:1–17; John 10:11; Isa. 62:5).
- Look to Him not only as Savior, but as your Lord, example, and elder Brother—altogether lovely, infinitely worthy, and perfectly faithful.
Robert Murray M’Cheyne put it beautifully:
“For every look at yourself, take ten looks at Christ. He is altogether lovely. Such infinite majesty, and yet such meekness and grace, and all for sinners, even the chief!”
This is the key to consistency. The more we see of Christ’s beauty and sufficiency, the more we are drawn to trust, obey, and imitate Him.
Transparency and Grace
Colossians 3 reminds us that the “new self” is being renewed in knowledge—not in self-effort or isolation, but in a growing awareness of the truth in Christ. We are not just called to behave better, but to become like Him. And that begins with truth in the inward parts.
One way we “lie to one another” is by hiding behind vague generalities instead of naming and confessing our sins and struggles. We keep quiet to save face. But that self-protection keeps us from transformation.
As C.S. Lewis wrote:
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken… The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.”
Leadership, love, and transparency all require vulnerability. But in Christ, we are safe to be known. His grace covers us. His people are called to walk with us. The Christian life is not a performance—it’s a pilgrimage. No one walks it well alone.
Freedom and Responsibility
Christian freedom is never a license for spiritual laziness. It is the power to walk in joyful, Spirit-empowered responsibility. In the home, that freedom should not lead us to do less, but to embrace more—more joy, more service, more prayer, more love.
Not every home will look the same. But every Christian household should be a mini-sanctuary where Christ is honored, Scripture is treasured, love is shown, and sin is confessed. That requires leadership marked not only by truth but also by warmth, not only by correction but by encouragement.
Leadership in the home is not just stepping up in times of crisis—it’s creating a rhythm of righteousness and rejoicing. Singing psalms and hymns, praying together, celebrating the Lord’s Day, confessing sins quickly, laughing around the table—these are the habits that form faithful homes.
Strength and Gentleness
Christian leadership requires the courage to confront and the humility to listen. It requires strength enough to protect and meekness enough to wash feet.
Our Lord leads His church with authority, but also with compassion. He speaks the hard word, but never with hardness of heart. His yoke is easy, and His burden is light.
Husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, and children—imitate Him. Lead with truth and tenderness. Take initiative in prayer, in repentance, in joy. Say “I was wrong.” Say “thank you.” Say “I love you.” Not because you’ve mastered it all, but because Christ is at work in you.
As M’Cheyne also said:
“Let your soul be filled with a heart-ravishing sense of the sweetness and excellency of Christ and all that is in Him… Let the Holy Spirit fill every chamber of your heart; and so there will be no room for folly, or the world, or Satan, or the flesh.”
Walking It Out: Practical Steps Toward Christ-Centered Faithfulness
To help us move from conviction to action, here are a few ways to cultivate Christ-centered consistency in our homes and lives:
1. Begin the Day Looking to Christ
- Read a short passage from the Gospels or Psalms each morning.
- Pause to consider one glory of Christ: His compassion, His justice, His humility, His power, His patience.
- Pray: “Lord Jesus, show me more of You today. Help me to reflect You in all I do.”
2. Speak the Truth in Love in Your Home
- Confess sin quickly and clearly: “I was wrong. Please forgive me.”
- Encourage generously: “I see God at work in you.”
- Ask regularly: “How can I grow as a spouse/father/mother/child?” Listen and repent accordingly…
3. Create Simple, Sustainable Habits
- One meal a day where Scripture is read or discussed.
- Weekly Sabbath celebration: prayer, song, feast, and rest.
- Monthly family check-in: “What are we thankful for? What do we need to change?”
4. Lead with Joy
- Initiate celebration: light candles at dinner, sing a hymn before bed, thank God for little things (The Hammonds are great at this! Ask them for help.).
- Laugh more. Your joy in Christ is infectious.
- Teach through encouragement, not just correction.
5. Walk in Community
- Don’t isolate. Share your struggles with a trusted brother or sister in Christ.
- Commit to weekly Lord’s Day worship with your church family. In fact, participate in every church service, program, and function you can. It helps more than you realize.
- Pray regularly with another family, couple, or friend.
A Final Word of Encouragement
If you feel like you’ve failed more than you’ve succeeded, you’re in good company. Christ didn’t come for the righteous, but for sinners. He is not ashamed to call you His brother or sister. He is not disappointed that you need Him—He delights to give you grace.
He is altogether lovely. Look to Him. Listen to Him. Learn from Him. Follow Him.
“Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.” —Hebrews 12:2
“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” —Galatians 6:9
May the Lord help us to be consistent in looking to Him, knowing Him, loving Him, and living for Him.
In Christ’s service and yours,
Nick Esch